Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Trying to sleep with a broken heart .

I never like Father's Day . I never celebrate it ever since he left . To me , Father's Day is so meaningless . It's like dad doesn't exist in this world but actually he's around . Just thousand miles away . I hope he's doing fine .

The last time we celebrated Father's Day together when i was 5 year old . That's like 14 years ago . I still remember things we did together . We used to made cookies and it doesn't taste like one at all . You used to take me out for a ride whenever i make noise and doesn't want to stay at home . You bought me lots of toys , barbie dolls , polly pockets everytime when we went out . You took us out for dinner every weekends to our fave seafood and western restaurant . Somewhere at Ampang , KL . I still remember . You took us for holidays though is not somewhere in overseas but we had fun together and we cherised every moments we had until the day you left me and Mama . Incident that i will never forget . I had hard time at that moment . It wasn't easy for me until today . To not have you by my side whenever i need you .

The last time we talked on the phone was last end month of February and the last time i met you when i was 17 before you left to Dubai . After that nobody knows what happened to you . No text reply from you , no phone calls , no e-mails . You disappeared yourself from me and until today i do not know what was the caused . Daddy , i know that you will never read my blog , but i wish one day you will read this post . I love you dad . I really do . I love you from the day i was born , from the day i started to called you " Daddy " , from the day you hold me in your arms until the day you left me . I still love you . I never hate , although my tongue keep on saying it a lot but daddy trust me i never hate , i was just disappointed . Every day and night whenever i think of you , i cry myself to sleep . I just miss you so much . I just want to see you or at least talk to you but you never asnwer my calls . Daddy , i swear it hurts me . Father's Day meant nothing to me because i never had a chance to celebrate it with you like other daughters in the world did with their lovely dads .

I Love You Daddy from the bottom of my broken heart .

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